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Dave Martell
12-06-2011, 10:09 PM
So what are they? :clown:

ajhuff
12-06-2011, 10:13 PM
Mid-tech

:laugh:

-AJ

jmforge
12-06-2011, 10:14 PM
Deanimator?

kalaeb
12-06-2011, 10:14 PM
Mid-tech

:laugh:

-AJ

:rofl::rofl::rofl:

HHH Knives
12-06-2011, 10:25 PM
Mid-tech

:laugh:

-AJ

:yeahthat:

Marko Tsourkan
12-06-2011, 10:28 PM
Tactical
Benchmade
Mid-tech

I would not call them stupidest, just odd and confusing

Andrew H
12-06-2011, 10:33 PM
Hmm... I'm guessing Dave was thinking of some other names, but I'll go with mid-tech. :)

HHH Knives
12-06-2011, 10:37 PM
Alright, I am guilty of naming one of our knife a ridiculous name.. OK go ahead and laugh. I dont blame ya!

"Tacticool" :rofl2:

http://www.hhhcustomknives.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/vacation_114.jpg

kalaeb
12-06-2011, 10:38 PM
Furi

Miracle Blade

apicius9
12-06-2011, 10:42 PM
I'm not saying it, that can only lead to trouble again...

Stefan

bprescot
12-06-2011, 10:42 PM
Alright, I'll go with:

Cermax - ***? Took me a long time before it sunk through my thick skull that these guys weren't ceramic

Chroma "Haiku" - Seriously? Seriously? The Haiku? The line was geared 100% towards the "dumb American" market. Right down to the BS description of a faux mekugi pin in the cheap-ass handle, the marketing material was essentially, "What, you like Japanese? Cuz this is SOOOO Japanese. WAY more Japanese than Shun, so you should buy this instead!"

Artifex - Props for the Latin. Married to a former classics, major, so major props for the Latin. Of course, as soon as you order more than one, you've ordered Artifeces and that sounds like sh!t.

Marko Tsourkan
12-06-2011, 10:49 PM
I recall seeing Santoku line of knives from a maker in Seattle area.


I'm not saying it, that can only lead to trouble again...

Stefan

You are not being too cryptic.

tkern
12-06-2011, 10:54 PM
The Wasabi line.

Chef Niloc
12-06-2011, 10:57 PM
#1 Richmand Addict,
#2 Richmand Remedy
#3 Richmand Fanatic
#4 Richmand Boner
#5 yoshi Blade
#6 the Miracle blade...3!
#7 F. Dick
#8 Samurai pro
#9 globle express
#10 the "Furi Rachael Ray Copper tail"

Marko Tsourkan
12-06-2011, 10:58 PM
Hmm... Has anybody heard about Seppuku Pro line? Guaranteed to work as advertised.

NO ChoP!
12-06-2011, 11:00 PM
#1 Richmand Addict,
#2 Richmand Remedy
#3 Richmand Fanatic
#4 Richmand Boner
#5 yoshi Blade
#6 the Miracle blade...3!
#7 F. Dick
#8 Samurai pro
#9 globle express
#10 the "Furi Rachael Ray Copper tail"


#7....F'in Dick!!!! LOL, Really?

Dave Martell
12-06-2011, 11:06 PM
#1 Richmand Addict,
#2 Richmand Remedy
#3 Richmand Fanatic
#4 Richmand Boner
#5 yoshi Blade
#6 the Miracle blade...3!
#7 F. Dick
#8 Samurai pro
#9 globle express
#10 the "Furi Rachael Ray Copper tail"


How dare you put RR's copper tail on that list?!?

kalaeb
12-06-2011, 11:14 PM
Successful fishing trip on choppy waters.

WildBoar
12-06-2011, 11:20 PM
Knuckle Sandwich

mpukas
12-06-2011, 11:21 PM
CarboNext - f**cking stupid

Andrew H
12-07-2011, 12:02 AM
Artifex - Props for the Latin. Married to a former classics, major, so major props for the Latin. Of course, as soon as you order more than one, you've ordered Artifeces and that sounds like sh!t.

Google to make you seem more knowledgeable than you are, I'm all for that.

Eamon Burke
12-07-2011, 12:25 AM
Hmm... Has anybody heard about Seppuku Pro line? Guaranteed to work as advertised.
:spitcoffee:



10. Artifex
9. Global G-#
8. Miracle Blade Chop n' Scoop
7. Hënckelhöff Ice Forge Hardened Friodor international pro Vier-star twin-cuisine grand chef precision edge series
6. Kasumi
5. Prospect
4. Cutco
3. Wasabi
2. Carbonext
1. Knuckle sandwich

bprescot
12-07-2011, 12:28 AM
Google to make you seem more knowledgeable than you are, I'm all for that.

On my part or Mark's? If mine, credit goes to the wife, at least as far as telling me what it meant. I know just enough to have figured out on my own the tricky pluralization. :wink:

bprescot
12-07-2011, 12:29 AM
Holy crap, I forgot the Knuckle Sandwich. Can I switch my vote to that for worst name?

tkern
12-07-2011, 12:34 AM
Miracle blade chop n scoop? Is that for both prepping food and cleaning out litter boxes?

Eamon Burke
12-07-2011, 12:38 AM
Does what it says on the tin:
Will avert laws of nature and overcome the bounds of reality to allow you to supernaturally put food on the knife after you cut it.

tkern
12-07-2011, 12:49 AM
A knife like that must go for at least $200. I wonder if there is a way I can get a discount or perhaps 2 for the price of one if I act now?

El Pescador
12-07-2011, 12:58 AM
I like the name Artifex.

rulesnut
12-07-2011, 01:07 AM
How dare you put RR's copper tail on that list?!?

Rut Roh, You have incurred the wrath of Dave by dissing RR.

Andrew H
12-07-2011, 01:13 AM
On my part or Mark's? If mine, credit goes to the wife, at least as far as telling me what it meant. I know just enough to have figured out on my own the tricky pluralization. :wink:

Mark. Having a Latin name for something these days is just begging to make you and your product seem sophisticated. It also doesn't help that it translates into something like artisan or craftsman when it is made by a company.

karloevaristo
12-07-2011, 01:55 AM
#1 Richmand Addict,
#2 Richmand Remedy
#3 Richmand Fanatic
#4 Richmand Boner
#5 yoshi Blade
#6 the Miracle blade...3!
#7 F. Dick
#8 Samurai pro
#9 globle express
#10 the "Furi Rachael Ray Copper tail"

#4... really? wow... haha!

mr drinky
12-07-2011, 02:51 AM
I think most branded names suck and are awkward at best. Unless it is a company with some lineage, the maker's name along with his collective knifemaking identity (i.e., acquired skills, unique design traits, qualifications etc.) are all that are needed IMO. However, the irony is that the less one knows about knifemaking, the more branding catchy names seems to be the case. Got to fill in that missing knifemaking identity with something I guess. And CarboNext is atrocious.

k.

jmforge
12-07-2011, 03:10 AM
If you REALLY want to see some funny names for knives, take a stroll over to the Tacticool section.:doublethumbsup:

Peco
12-07-2011, 03:20 AM
Messermeister San Moritz elite Knives
- and I completely agree with the M. R i c h m o n d lines ...

jmforge
12-07-2011, 04:00 AM
I think you fine and refined gentlemen need a bit of perspective on the whole topic of stupid knife names, etc. I do not mean to violate any forum rules but ANYONE who is into knives absolutely needs to check out this website if you want a good laugh mixed in with a modicum of disbelief and disgust.:lol2:
You have been warned. Put on your hip waders cuz it gets deep quick. Make sure that you check out the prices on the knives and especially the "sheath system". Once you have had a good laugh, i will tell you the dirty little secret. Anyone who figures it out, keep quiet.:lol2:
www.razrknife.com

Twistington
12-07-2011, 05:02 AM
Yeah, the Richmönd knives have sad names, sure you will remember the product but in my book names like that belong on the pc-gaming market(mousepads etc) :/

Mac Ultimate

Everything with "HD" in the name.

Randy: "Tacticool"... wow that was something! :lol2:

Hermes7792
12-07-2011, 07:52 AM
Aren't the ******** knives still good knives?

Why does no one like them on KKF or CKTG for that matter?

Sorry for the off topic post I'm just confused!

mano
12-07-2011, 09:05 AM
Carbonext: very good knife with a very bad name
Knuckle sandwich: very bad name that at least makes me chuckle

Marko Tsourkan
12-07-2011, 09:19 AM
I think you fine and refined gentlemen need a bit of perspective on the whole topic of stupid knife names, etc. I do not mean to violate any forum rules but ANYONE who is into knives absolutely needs to check out this website if you want a good laugh mixed in with a modicum of disbelief and disgust.:lol2:
You have been warned. Put on your hip waders cuz it gets deep quick. Make sure that you check out the prices on the knives and especially the "sheath system". Once you have had a good laugh, i will tell you the dirty little secret. Anyone who figures it out, keep quiet.:lol2:
www.razrknife.com

Yuck

Sarge
12-07-2011, 10:46 AM
Yeah CarboNext very very dumb. And Mark's knives very poorly named

Marko Tsourkan
12-07-2011, 10:58 AM
Yeah CarboNext very very dumb. And Mark's knives very poorly named

Dumb names are catchy and easily memorable - a great marketing if "sophisticated" public (a step about buying German knives) is your target. I am sure more thought went into coining some of these names than you think.

jmforge
12-07-2011, 12:16 PM
You are being kind, Marko. :D What was even funnier/crazier is when Mr. J. Lightning got on the forums to defend his product/business practices against all of the lesser beings of the knifemaking world.
Yuck

Marko Tsourkan
12-07-2011, 12:22 PM
You are being kind, Marko. :D What was even funnier/crazier is when Mr. J. Lightning got on the forums to defend his product/business practices against all of the lesser beings of the knifemaking world.

Isn't it how the world works - big, nastiest fish eats small ones?

K-Fed
12-07-2011, 01:38 PM
Knuckle Sandwich

+ ∞

Marko Tsourkan
12-07-2011, 02:02 PM
+ ∞

That one is not clever, but admit, it is catchy. Even people with ADD like me remembers it from hearing it the fist time. :)

stevenStefano
12-07-2011, 07:00 PM
Just 1, that sadly seems to be out of production. This is the winner by far, in both the Ugliest Knife Ever and Stupidest Knife Name categories. Can't believe nobody has posted this yet. But I give you the Goldhamster Solicut Plenum Santoku Special (http://www.edenwebshops.co.uk/en/pt/-goldhamster-solicut-plenum-santoku-special.htm)

Eamon Burke
12-07-2011, 08:07 PM
Aren't the ******** knives still good knives?


The names are what is being discussed here, sir. I get the other names, The Addict was a knife for knife enthusiasts(I remember when it was going to be sold handle-less and someone said it was a knife that only knife addicts would like to see for sale), and Remedy sounds like "the panacea for your knife addiction", and Fanatic is more of the same. The Artifex sounds like a Magic The Gathering card(ok that I'm actually cool with). It is because I used to live in Austin, and if I had a dollar for ever time I've seen/heard the word "Artifex" punned with "Art Effects" I would be drinking scotch on a Hawaiian beach right now.

apicius9
12-07-2011, 09:02 PM
....I would be drinking scotch on a Hawaiian beach right now.

Hey, come join me :) Just make sure you bring brown paper bags, no alcohol on the beaches...

stefan

jheis
12-08-2011, 12:47 AM
#10 the "Furi Rachael Ray Copper tail"

Ahh, but you can shave down the copper tail to maintain the balance of the knife as it wears ... as if it was ever balanced in the first place! And it's made in China from German steel. That said, it's great for hacking up frozen food and opening cans of paint - may be the perfect beater knife. And it's got grantons! What more could you ask for?

James

GlassEye
12-08-2011, 12:53 AM
Just 1, that sadly seems to be out of production. This is the winner by far, in both the Ugliest Knife Ever and Stupidest Knife Name categories. Can't believe nobody has posted this yet. But I give you the Goldhamster Solicut Plenum Santoku Special (http://www.edenwebshops.co.uk/en/pt/-goldhamster-solicut-plenum-santoku-special.htm)

I remember seeing this posted on a forum in the past, can't remember if it was here or elsewhere. I like how it appears to have little Goldhamster droppings printed on the blade.

Seb
12-08-2011, 04:29 AM
Santuko.

memorael
12-08-2011, 08:51 AM
Hmm... Has anybody heard about Seppuku Pro line? Guaranteed to work as advertised.

So is this knife aimed at the Emo and suicidal tendencies populous?