Okay, since the statue of limitations has not run on many of my funny stories, I will tell one on someone else. My youngest brother's best friend is a colo-rectal surgeon. Before he moved on to the greener pastures of Harvard for the rest of his rediency and Georgetown for his fellowship, he was an intern/resident at St, Vincent's hospital which sits at 12th Street and 7th Avenue in Manhattan, on the northern edge of Greenwich Village. Needless to say, the Village has historically had a very large gay population and, to be quite honest a rather colorful one at that. My brothers friend is a straight as they come, but he was also a very good looking 26 year old blonde Polish doc working at the Saturday Night Knife And Gun Club in the Village. In short order, some of the local denizens found out that there was this hunky young medico working at the local hospital who specialized in disorders of the bunghole. All of a sudden, some of them started showing up at the ER looking for young Allen and claiming symptoms of disorders related to his rather amusing specialty. The bad news is that many of these issues involved objects lodged in the, well, lets just say nether regions. After a while, our young doctor couldn't help but notice that not only were there what seemed like an inordinately large number of these cases, but the patients had taken the time and effort in the midst of their great discomfort, to dress in their sexy Sunday best for their visit to the hospital. As our young doctor was a nice Jesuit educated Polish Catholic boy from Ohio, this was all new to him. At some level he found it amusing, but he was really getting tired of these loons wasting his time and hospital resources and although he was not a homophobe, this was pretty nasty stuff regardless of any considerations of sexual orientation. he resolved that if any more of these guys showed up, he would tell them that their condition would required some from of gruesome, invasive surgery to remove the object. That seemed to solve the problem after only one try. A young man, dresssed in his spiffiest outfit of course, came in one Saturday night with a "problem" He claimed that he had accidentally slipped and fallen on a rather large candle, which had, of course, lodged itself far up the descending colon. Our young doctor told him of the horrific and potentially life threatening procedure required to remove the object and the patient thanked him and left the ER as fast as his fashionably shod feet could carry him................WITH HIS MOTHER IN TOW!!!!!!! Yes, you read correctly. Our doctor friend speculated that the "fell on the candle story" was devised in part because the patient had his elderly mother bring him to the hospital to have the offending object removed!!!!!!!!!:lol2:
